hottie mcbody

the most sure fire way to make me roll my eyes and sigh is to start your story off with the phrase, "ok so there's this guy..."

i will huff and your droning wah-wah voice will begin numbing my ears while i mindwander to much more stimulating topics. like drying paint.


So please spare me the energy of faking my attention and don't tell me, especially if you don't want my opinion. Now, if you want me to just smile, nod, and say "YES! I think you SHOULD take him back"....then just tell me.....and then cue me when said line should be inserted in our conversation. Because frankly, I'm 23 going on 45 and I'm so beyond any fake enthusiasm about a naive girl falling for a douchejacket a**hole. The story's been done, pick something more original.


Now if someone came to me and said "Ok so there's this lesbian..." you can be sure to have my undivided attention. Just please, girls, grow some ovaries, get all dolled up, and act like fucking ladies. Guys play girls who let themselves be played and this storyline is totally played out. Just like your self-respect.